My name is Sandy. For the past few years, my wife and I have had many struggles in our marriage. We finally got sick of the fighting and decided that we should seek help before our marriage ends up in a divorce. I needed to stop feeling that my husband doesn’t respect me. After researching what to do, I came across Mort Fertel’s Marriage Fitness program. I would like to share with you about what lead us to seek the help for our marriage.
Thirty two years ago, I married my husband Leo. Together, we have three children together whom we both adore. Even though I love that my husband adores our children, I feel that he doesn’t adore me anymore. It seems that a normal conversation between the two of us always has to escalate to a big fight where one of us leaves the house.
The tension started off by constant sarcastic remarks being made by my husband, toward me and people who were friends with me. After a while of dealing with the sarcasm, it turned into always being belittled by my husband. Nothing that I did was right, and no matter what, I was wrong in every situation.
Instead of being excited for my husband to come home from work, I would dread him walking through the door. I was so sick and tired of him belittling me, the thought of being around him for even a second bothered me. I wanted to stand up for myself but didn’t feel that whatever I would say would matter to my husband. Even though I wanted to confront the situation, I chose to ignore it and wish things would magically get better.
My hopes of things getting better with my husband seemed to be disappearing, and because I was hiding so much anger and sadness, every little thing would bother me. Instead of snapping at my husband, I would take out my frustration on my children, even when they did nothing wrong. After turning into a miserable person to be around, my children approached me to try to alleviate the situation.
I could not live with my children seeing me depressed all of the time, and though I wasn’t strong enough to stand up to my husband for myself, nothing would hold me back when it came to my children. When I first approached my husband, he told me that I was absolutely crazy and over emotional. After giving my husband example after example, he finally realized that my feelings were indeed rational emotions.
Leo was unable to give me a reason to why he was the way he was, and he actually suggested that we seek professional help. We both thought it would be best to help my husband work through what was bothering him, and to help me learn ways to stop thinking that my husband doesn’t respect me. Through this program, we were able to learn how to better communicate and adore each other again all from the comfort of our own home.
We unsuccessfully went to marriage counseling. I wanted to make things work but didn’t know where to turn. I found Mort’s program on the internet. I liked the alternative approach to counseling. Overall it has been a steady improvement.
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